Am I an atheist, or not? It depends on the definition of “atheist”, and on the mindset of the person asking. In Europe I label myself agnostic, because I have no understanding of why there is a Universe. But in the United States it’s easiest to say I’m an atheist, because anything short of that implies support for the idea of a personal God.
I find offensive the idea of a personal God who, swayed by the emotional appeal of prayers from the devout, favors one person over another. I don’t care whether they’re praying about healing an illness, or winning a ballgame, or picking the right lottery ticket – what morality is there in an omnipotent deity who would intervene in that, and not intervene in the most extreme situations of human suffering?
I find illogical the idea of a God who creates individuals and then punishes them for acting according to the nature they were given.
I find simplistic the idea that God’s Universe is focused on Earth (let alone on one particular tribe, or sect, or individual), when the Earth is only a small planet of a small star, and there could be more stars in the Universe than there are grains of sand on all the beaches of the whole world.
So I’m certain that the personal God of the average American believer doesn’t exist, and couldn’t possibly exist.
But as for exactly what force is the wellspring of the Universe, and what qualities it has, that’s where I’m a militant agnostic:
“I don’t know, and you don’t know either.”